We have outgrown from our fairy tale lands,

Intertwined hands, watching our castle of dreams built in the sand,

At the farewell , I just couldn't bring myself to cry,

Who knew we would raise our hands to say goodbye.

Bitterness

September 2011, It gave me scorching feeling in throat and attacked my nasal system.Yes, To experiment i tried that white stick  which you call cigarette.To be honest, I didn't like it so it didn't repeat.I felt like a patient who got an asthma attack just because of own stupid act.In short i hated it to the core.The ones who accompanied me continued to smoke.I smiled and left the place to order some pizza & pasta from domino's.Later they bragged the story may be because for some smoking is something that the world in general had to know about.May be because they thought it was cool enough to flaunt.May be a sign of progress to prove they were all grown up.

I wonder why people actually smoke and i guess i ll wonder that for whole of my life.Let me tell you If you're not a smoker, It is something less idiotic than insanity.I pity those chain smokers who die daily just merely for creating those fancy shapes which fly out of their mouth.

P.S. I like mint hukkah though but it is entirely different from this shit.  

♥ your journey.

Its your road.Your feet.Why then would you walk down a path someone else wants for you, settle for a life that doesn't delight you, live without passion and  charisma which you can shower?Decide where you want to go.Then start walking in that direct.Easy to say i know but even Rome wasn't built in a day.Just.Start.Walking.The rest will reveal itself.Always trust your dreams.They've chosen you as much as you've chosen them.If anyone ever try to make you dig a grave just Listen, Smile, Agree and Do whatever the fuck you were gonna do anyway.Two things define you; The way you manage things when you've nothing and the way you behave when you've everything. *Peace* 

Your voice of reason

"You may not know where you're going, but you know that so long as you spread your wings, the winds will carry you."
- C. Joybell c. 

I admit i know the feeling of not knowing where I am going but most of the times i love it because it is only when i look up for craziest things to explore and this begins a flight with no landing in sight. woha!that rhymed *laughs*  As i fly, I may not be sure of where I'm going but one thing is for sure.I won't regret that i didn't even try.Of all the crazy adventures I have had in life, I would have had more regret if I didn’t do them than when I did when did do them.

Spread your wings and let the miracles unfold.  

Memories when usher sleepless night,

The patches of unheard pain flickers in light,

The silence of hope windchime sings,

Soothing complexion of stillness it brings.

I'm just not useless, I'm phoneless too.

I wasted away my morning searching for a phone with a decent camera and found nothing because my price range is about 10k and yes, Being useless was an old story ; Now I'm phoneless too.Am i missing something?Not at all except the finalization of venue and time to meet two old friends.The best part is i have been so dependent on contact list that i really never cared enough to remember the number.I honestly don’t receive too many calls and when I do, it usually is of some importance.I have become one of those who won't be able to call family and friends if she didn't look up their numbers in cellphone first.FML seriously.Needless to say, it is only when we lose cellular phones that we truly realize how dependent on them we really are.Funny how the devices that make our life less complicated and stressful can also cause stress and complicate our simplicity.I guess it is not going to be that bad going without phone for couple of days or almost a week i guess.I'll begin the shopping once pitra paksha ends.

Marital Rape

According to wikipedia :

Marital rape, also known as spousal rape, is non-consensual sex in which the perpetrator is the victim's spouse. It is a form of partner rape, of domestic violence, and of sexual abuse. It can be equally, if not more, emotionally and physically damaging than rape by a stranger.Once widely condoned or ignored by law, spousal rape is now repudiated by international conventions and increasingly criminalized. Still, in many countries, spousal rape either remains legal, or is illegal but widely tolerated, with the laws against it being rarely enforced. Traditional views on marriage which dictate that a woman must be (sexually) submissive to her husband continue to be common in many parts of the world.

Once widely condoned or ignored by law, spousal rape is now repudiated by international conventions and increasingly criminalised. Still, in many countries, spousal rape either remains legal, or is illegal but widely tolerated and accepted as a spouse’s prerogative.” - See more at: http://blog.tehelka.com/will-criminalising-marital-rape-destroy-the-institution-of-marriage/#sthash.DMLWFqUQ.dpuf

Once widely condoned or ignored by law, spousal rape is now repudiated by international conventions and increasingly criminalised. Still, in many countries, spousal rape either remains legal, or is illegal but widely tolerated and accepted as a spouse’s prerogative.” - See more at: http://blog.tehelka.com/will-criminalising-marital-rape-destroy-the-institution-of-marriage/#sthash.DMLWFqUQ.dpuf

Once widely condoned or ignored by law, spousal rape is now repudiated by international conventions and increasingly criminalised. Still, in many countries, spousal rape either remains legal, or is illegal but widely tolerated and accepted as a spouse’s prerogative.” - See more at: http://blog.tehelka.com/will-criminalising-marital-rape-destroy-the-institution-of-marriage/#sthash.DMLWFqUQ.dpuf

Once widely condoned or ignored by law, spousal rape is now repudiated by international conventions and increasingly criminalised. Still, in many countries, spousal rape either remains legal, or is illegal but widely tolerated and accepted as a spouse’s prerogative.” - See more at: http://blog.tehelka.com/will-criminalising-marital-rape-destroy-the-institution-of-marriage/#sthash.DMLWFqUQ.dpuf

To make it more clear marital Rape refers to unwanted intercourse by a man with his wife obtained by force, threat of force, or physical violence, or when she is unable to give consent. Marital rape could be by the use of force only, a battering rape or a sadistic/obsessive rape.Approximations have quoted that every 6 hours; a young married woman is burnt or beaten to death, or driven to suicide from emotional abuse by her husband.The UN Population Fund states that more than 2/3rds of married women in India, aged between 15 to 49 have been beaten, raped or forced to provide sex.

Strange but it is true that despite of various amendments, law commissions and new legislation, one of the most humiliating act is not an offense in India.And icing to the cake is NDTV's News dated on March 01, 2013 where the government clearly said that criminalizing marital rape would weaken traditional family values in India, and that marriage presumes consent, arguments opposed fiercely by women's activists.While rape by a stranger gets clearly defined as rape, rape by a spouse has its boundaries blurred. 

While rape by a stranger gets clearly defined as rape, rape by a spouse has its boundaries blurred. - See more at: http://blog.tehelka.com/will-criminalising-marital-rape-destroy-the-institution-of-marriage/#sthash.DMLWFqUQ.dpuf

While rape by a stranger gets clearly defined as rape, rape by a spouse has its boundaries blurred. - See more at: http://blog.tehelka.com/will-criminalising-marital-rape-destroy-the-institution-of-marriage/#sthash.DMLWFqUQ.dpuf

While rape by a stranger gets clearly defined as rape, rape by a spouse has its boundaries blurred. - See more at: http://blog.tehelka.com/will-criminalising-marital-rape-destroy-the-institution-of-marriage/#sthash.DMLWFqUQ.dpuf

Woman can protect her right to life and liberty, but not her body, within her marriage, which is just ironical.Some don’t even believe rape can occur within a marriage.Marital rape can be nearly impossible to prove.Old standards created by the society has its own identity which one is not supposed to question.A woman is to be her husband’s on demand provider of sexual comfort.Our society has this couple is accepted as husband and wife for the next many lives to come once they're done with performing the wedding ceremony where people are more concerned with what four people will say if one will raise her voice against the brutal behavior of  her partner.In a country caged in shackles of  misconceptions of rape, deeply ingrained cultural and religious stereotypes, and changing social values, globalization is still required to fast alter the letter of law.

Penny saved is a penny earned.

Earning isn't a cake walk as it seems to be and money plant doesn't manufacture those ample green notes for you and your family in bank accounts.I learned this at the age of 18 itself when i received my first hard earned income.I always had this habit of saving a little portion of whatever cash i used to get, I used to make list of things i would love to buy but once i had sufficient money i used to end up spending it all on other non important things.Even now at the age of 22 i haven't changed a bit i still save a portion of my non regular pocket money, make list of things to buy and then keep it aside when i realize i don't need the things i planned to purchase.Yes, here's a little difference and it is a sign of progress i guess.Time makes you realize the importance of decision making.To my surprise it has always been helpful, the balance between wants and needs is installed in the cells and I'm proud to announce that I have been able to fulfill my needs most of the times and sometimes my useless wants too because of the same without disturbing mom. xD

Penny saved is a penny earned they say.I understood the value and the meaning of this phrase.The most important thing is when i flaunt my stuff at least i can say i had the patience to earn it and instead of throwing tantrums on parents i managed to contribute my share.


Anyway what are your weekend plans? xD

And its a good day

The world feels good today. I woke up and there was a smile. It is a usual day, but there is something extra-ordinarily usual about it, or is it just me?May be because if we count the blessings instead of counting the loss the smile find a way back to home. I'm a simple girl, I don't dream a lot, I love rains only when I'm at home and there's no important work to finish, random insane conversations with my favorites makes my day, I can do things which are unpredictable just to see my close ones smiling, I dislike slangs but i know when to use them in best of manner, Sarcasm is my weapon to kill the selfish purpose of others who try to make me feel low, Mom's praise for almost not so good attempts at my cooking make me giggle, Spending almost half an hour trying to teach our pet how to behave in front of guests just to make him gentle dog and then declaring him useless is my pastime, Those 'Imma so lazy' and getting back to read novel thing makes me happy, Flaunting super extraordinary random drawing talent which becomes a subject of others laugh makes me laugh hysterically.It comes naturally to me because life has been very gracious when i look for reasons to laugh and giggle about.

Stroke of Remembrance

I felt trapped in a bubble wrap of jealousy.I woke up early today just to watch the raindrops coming down the window pane.Such mornings are beautiful, Isn't it?When i was a child i used to eagerly wait for rains to shower its blessings continuously until dad declare in sleepy voice "Baarish toh ruk hi nahi rahi hai chalo aaj chutti karlo warna beemar pad jaoge." Gone are the days when we used to have special rainy day breakfast including the hot jalebi's and pakore.Even now Maa never deny to prepare the same but then it doesn't have the flavour of togetherness.We miss him.We miss amma and baba.Only we know how it feels to lose 4 important family members one by one in merely span of 3 months.Just one stroke and it washed away everything.Its been almost 3 years but hardly there's any day we don't remember them.Papa's phone is still papa's phone, Amma's kitchen is still amma's kitchen, baba's room is still baba's room & maa keep talking about Naani too.Everything has changed yet somethings are still same.We may appear to be doing fine but the emptiness has created its mark which can never ever be replaced.There are days when i feel so miserable that i feel like running away from home and taking a shelter far away from the voices echoing in head but at the end of the day when I'm home it gives a sigh of relief that at least their memories do the talking.Call me insane because i till date mention my father a lot.Our fights, his over possessiveness, the times when he used to go beyond his pocket just to pamper me, his aspirations and dreams he weaved for me & how i crushed all.Is it necessary for a person to be  alive for being matter of somebody's talk?Duh.

I am determined to stand on my own soon.And this requires education and hard work.I’m now ready to give that.Better late than never right?Meanwhile i would like to take chances, find challenges in life.

 Let’s get mad.

From a wanderer's shell..

I left the crowd. Now I'm where I belong or may be I'm not..I still am not happy though and somewhere i feel I'm stuck in shackles of time but I'm not sad either.Why this feeling?I think i have lost my mind.Shit.No.I can't even write a thing that makes sense and here I am whining.I'm more than this.I can laugh endlessly, I can go out alone just to taste new variety of food but not right now.Because sometimes its just good to sit and pour out random shit like I'm doing just now.

Here i go..

Caressing a crying heart of my own,

Far away from the scary clown,

Deep inside dwells the murder conspiracy,

The dull lines of poetry - mocking sanity.

A shadow longs for its existence,

Perhaps its the time to build the distance,

The winters are on their way,

Whispers unveil as i try to run away.

Ain't afraid of sorrow,

Even when the sky throws the whines of rainbow,

It's the mind which knows no boundary,

When everything ends in a stroke of misery.

 

Let the life weave its own story

So many dreams trashed, some newly printed, few turned out to be nightmares and well, a handful crystallized too, though am yet to understand the complete picture of 2013, or better yet I leave it at that.I may not have blogged regularly but i do have my share of memories which i have kept close. I found something I wrote few months ago, yeah i found it in drafts today.

I am not too sure how the things may turn up however am hopeful.Somebody pointed out today that i have become selfish for an unknown reason which she is not able to figure out.Things change, people change and i got to change too.sometimes it is hard to let the part of you go so easily, sometimes it is as easy as a calk walk but let's face the truth that nobody can be adamant enough to restrict the entry of changes in life.May be, it was for good back then, may be this is for best now.How i wish if life was as smooth as we plan it to be, no twist and turns to untangle, no crossroads, no tough decisions to make at every step but then where else we would get a gift of feeling of pride, happiness and achievement from?Looks like, there’s a lot to be learnt, changed, adapted and let the life weave its own story, who knows it may turn out to be an adventure too.

Your Life …Your Decisions!!

It seems like my blog will die with happiness because it has got 3rd guest post from a pretty blogger Sabreen and I being typical me managed to delay the post for more than 2 weeks i guess because of laziness. No, I hate that look please Anyway Sabz Yeah, This is her twitter handle *Smiles* has done brilliant work in framing an impressive post which you can never expect from me. Thoko taali xD

Here it goes..
 

“Mom I scored 95% “, Diana squealed with joy. Thereafter, tears did not listen to the Matthew family and came out without warning. Diana’s cell phone did not stop beeping for one minute from that moment. Diana was overjoyed as she was not expecting so much from her Class tenth exams. And now she magically fulfilled the expectations of elders.

“Thank God Beti, your seat now stands assured at Xavier’s and Loyola College for Science (Major)”, said Mrs. Matthew. These were the two best colleges in Dharwad, a small city and a district in state of Karnataka.

Diana had always been exceptional in academics and some cultural activities and her faith was always sealed with Science being the next step after school. She lived in that age where, only those who lacked interest in studies went for streams like humanities and commerce. Her dad had always wanted her to become an engineer, as he could not become one, due to financial crisis.

It was fed into her central nervous system that she was born to be an engineer. She was also very happy with it. Then she joined college and started off well. Gradually, she started enjoying her English classes more than her first love subjects math and science. The reason being, English needed less efforts to be put in and she always scored well. She worked a lot on her ‘to- be’ engineer subjects, but in vain.

When the final results came, she somehow passed all subjects, scoring almost a 90 in English. She was happy that she cleared all subjects, while the other Matthews were devastated. “Will I be able to pass engineering?” thought Diana. But somehow her dad managed to get a seat for her in one of the colleges in Mumbai. She was scared yet happy that she could now live on her own from now on.

She excelled throughout the engineering course with flying colors. She was placed in a very good MNC. In her non working hours, Diana made some time for  her own blog, where she scribbled simple thoughts of her own. She started hosting lots of events within her company. She loved her job as it gave scope for her hobbies to be taken care of. 

“I will work here forever Mom, even if they give less hikes”, she told her mom one evening over a telephonic conversation. But parental pressure had not come to an end for Diana after she became an engineer. Her mom said “look for higher technical studies, and look for better opportunities in other MNC’s”. She just said, “O.K. Mom” as she was too tired to be a part of any arguement.

“Should not have done engineering”, Diana told herself, feeling very annoyed. She hated the idea to study any more, but she could not tell her parents all this. Life was a cakewalk for her in the current company. But the same life had other plans for her.

Once during a mid-year project assignment, she had represented her company in order to visit some

clients, who were located in the beautiful state of Gujarat. Everything was good until some of the senior members were unnecessarily rude to her. Those guys made a huge crisis out of nothing, and Diana fell very insulted. “There are others who can handle clients in a much better way than you”, said one guy, who accompanied her. She blamed herself thinking she might have gone wrong somewhere and hence such reactions.

This feeling left her so broken that she needed external consultation to recover from the situation. Finally, she left her job. This was her first failure in life. She decided she will not work with any company but become a content writer, while working from home. She gave that up soon as she earned peanuts compared to her MNC job.

She spent the next three months sometimes doing nothing, sometimes wondering what to do, and sometimes searching for jobs. Finally she settled for a sales job in a small private venture. She thought this was her escape route from the root called “Engineering”.

But within three months she started cribbing about her company because of wee hour work timings and she got bored of the same schedule. She kept searching for other jobs, again with the feeling of being nowhere.

Then she found another job where she was hired for her engineering skills and experience, but later was moved into the Human Resources department. Finally she was happy. But was she really happy? Yes and No. Yes, because she earned good money. No, because she had not still found out what was her dream. What was ‘that’ she wanted herself to become?

She knew within her heart, she had a flair for writing. But was it enough? She continued to write her blog which earned quite a lot of fans.  But she knew, her subconscious dreams told her she should attempt writing no matter what. She never told her parents about this. Now Miss Diana is busy designing first few pages of her novel, while also doing her daily desk job.

Let’s all await her first novel to get published. Then we can also paste her success story someday, if at all it is successful. We do not know how her parents will react. But this brave girl has finally taken her own decisions.

The message that I have for all young minds:

·         It’s never too late to realize your dreams.

·         Time has changed; we can have multiple talents and hence try our hands at multiple professions too.

·         Take calculated risks in life.

·         You can never to be too busy to do things which you love.

·         Failure is always a stepping stone, it make you a stronger person.

P.S – awaiting feedback guys, this might decide if I can really realize my dream!!

Here's a token of thanks for you sabreen for sharing a beautiful post with us.

Of course your dreams will come true on one fine day. xD