Saturday, September 29, 2012

Being a girl is the last thing you would want to be.

 Do you want to be girl? Like, Forever?

The answer to this statement being a ‘YES’ is as rare as a good hair day on your first date. Especially if you are an Indian. I have nothing against my country but when it comes to being born as a girl, India would be the last place I would like to be born into.

The only day you might have wanted to be girl would be when you accidentally went to an interview without fully buttoning your shirt and your man boobs just quite didn't impress the boss, or when you had to hand over your 'hard-earned' money to your sister on Rakshabandhan.

If you still say yes “I would gladly be a girl” answer me:

Do you want guys to look at your tits instead of your eyes and pinch your ass instead of shaking your hand?
Do you want to be offered a job because somewhere in the back of your boss’s mind he thinks that you might be very good in bed and he has a chance?
Do you want to be called a slut just because you wear revealing clothes?
Do you want to be raped and then hear it was your fault because you were wearing a mini skirt?
Do you want to see your brother attend all night parties but not going yourself because, well you are a girl?
Do you want to reconsider your option of wearing white according to the weather?
Do you want to be stared at when you walk into a room where people are telling a dirty joke and they awkwardly stop midway at seeing you?
Do you want to wait an hour to find a decent washroom on a road trip?
Do you want to be paid less for an equal amount of work that a male colleague does?
Do you want to writhe in pain bleeding every month?
Do you want your parents to fuss over wherever you go, because they think everyone is going to rape you?
Do you want every guy commenting ‘hot’ on your Facebook picture just because it has a slight glimpse of your bra strap?
Yes I thought so too. You don’t have to worry about permissions when leaving the house. You don’t have to worry about any pain or bleeding when losing virginity. You don’t think twice before introducing your girlfriend to your family. You don’t need to act dumb to make a girl notice you. You don’t have to worry about your underwear glimpsing while doing weights in the gym. Unlike a girl, you just have to have sex to have a baby.

You don’t get people lecturing you about problems in future pregnancy if you smoke or drink.You get labelled with tag 'STUD' when you sleep around with numerous girls and nobody gives a shit to it later.The girl’s parents do not assume the fact that you are a Sanjeev Kapoor when you marry. Your name and your parents live with you forever.(or till when you want). You do not have to bear with the pain of hot wax (especially nowhere near your private area.) You do not have to worry about making crotch adjustments in public. And this is a list when we are talking about a girl who is born in a middle class family who have somehow managed to break free of the clutches of ancient practices of not educating the girl child.

Being a girl is very difficult. But its not like we had a choice. The very least that you can do is respect us.


Raajii said...

Bravo! I am so glad you wrote that. We have a long way to go and we need women like you :-)

Kanika said...

Amazing...Beautifully written.. :)

Subhayu said...

The question you have raised in your blog is the one that I have asked myself many times. If you ask me if I’ll like the idea of being a girl, my answer will be an emphatic ‘NO’. No, I don’t believe women are in anyway inferior to men but I’ll say ‘no’ because I simply feel content & fulfilled being a man. The ‘Manly’ feeling is so blissful and also it’s too blissful when I notice girls looking at me with admire. I am pretty sure that most of the girls feel equally fulfilled for being women.
That was the main reason but the points you have raised are also important ones. I often feel bad when I look around and see how girls have to live their life. Things like Increasing incidents of sexual violence & domestic violence against women, gender discriminations & repression against women in professional, social & family set up, negative social attitude towards women, treating women as a piece of meat, lack of facilities for women etc. horrifies me and these are surely important issues for which I’ll never be willing to be a girl.
But all these issues exist in the anti-feminist societies in the Third World nations. If God makes me a woman in my next life, I’ll pray that I am born in such a society where anti-feminism doesn’t exist.
But one thing I like to highlight. Any society that represses its women can’t make its men happy either. In such a society, pressure of performance is very high on men. As women are looked down upon, expectations from men rises above the sky. A man is expected to perform, work, earn money, and look after his parents, wife, and children. Rarely a man gets a selfless relationship in such a society. When he is unable to perform as per expectations, he is considered weak or loser. Society is not so kind to a man who is loser. Even his family members become unkind to him. In such a situation, such men often become depressed & frustrated and gradually he becomes alcoholic or abuser. Don’t get me wrong, I am not advocating for alcoholism or abusiveness. But such things happen in real.
But in a feminist liberal society, women shares lots of responsibilities with men hence they took away much pressure from men. Hence a liberal feminist society is truly a happy society.

Pria said...

Oh no.. hell yes I want to be girl! All that you mentioned is happening or we feel only because we are still giving a chance for people to think that way. There are many other countries who treat girls this way and many other countries who respect girls and equal to boys. It started as an old trend. Lets think changing the trend and I am sure future follow it. :)

Ordinary Gal said...

ahh i so wanted to write this kind of post..well written dear.

Rahul Bhatia said...

Sunakshi, this was a very thoughtful post which portrays the grim reality! I only hope the things get better as to be born as a girl is the biggest blessing notwithstanding the very harsh reality you mentioned. Wish you all the best :)

ambika said...

So true...!!
The struggle we go through is not the same for guys.
Guys dOnt hv to do anything they jst sit around and tell there parents that we want this...on the other hand we girls have to go through lot of struggle and question answer round to get one damn thing.
Being a girl is ofcourse the bes thing... Because what girls do and can do... Can never be compared to the work these guys do...!!
Inthe end shona superb job done...!! Bravo...!!

Annanya Bhardwaj said...

awesome one sweetheart!!!!
Hard core reality which you have had the guts to say it all......... M PROUD OF YOU........KEEP IT UP....
Parents should read it also....maybe they would feel a change....

Anu ~*~ said...

Kool post dear .. you expressed your Points beautifully in this post ..


kanika said...

thnx...... :)

Red Handed said...

We should be proud...we live through all the atrocities and still manage to outdo the male gang!
love the post!!!
how u doing btw?

its me!!! sharan :) said...

Amazing..beautiful and so truthful...
compelled to forward the link to friends..

Keep writing :)

Amnn.......//1! said...

okk chilll ,,,lolll,,
u conviced me ....that i dont want to be a girl ,,,,

*★.• The moment you get attached to things you screw it up! The challenge of life is to appreciate everything and attach yourself to nothing. *★.•
This blog is my private territory.The content posted here do not represent your life or perspective- just mine.Your disagreement, irritation at any content posted over this blog doesn't give ample ground for you to post nasty,bitchy messages/comments.Furthermore I'm free to post anything i pleases to, which is not under any copyright restrictions,so you can't squeal until it's your own stuff.